Medieval Christmas Market in Esslingen

The Friday after Thanksgiving we took the kids to the Medieval Christmas Market in Esslingen. Our favorite part was the fun Medieval Carnival Games. The picture below is Mouse Roulette. You put your money on the colored spot over the mouse hole that you think the mouse will go in. Whoever guesses right gets a prize. We also got to watch some medieval minstrels play on bagpipes--pretty cool, but so loud!

One of our favorite Medieval games was where they set a real egg in a carved out spot of a wooden stump that was about 10 feet away from you. They gave you some heavy metal balls and you tried to smash the egg by throwing the metal balls and hitting it. These last 2 pictures of Joe and Sam are hard to make out exactly what they're doing, but Joe chose to throw "Chinese Stars" and you try to get them to stick in the logs and Sam is throwing axes at logs and trying to get them to stick in. Mason threw stars and Jacob threw axes also. It was a boys paradise. Thank heavens OSHA hasn't seen this Christmas market--they might think it was dangerous or something to give sharp metal objects to children between the ages of 5 and 9. The guy who did the axe throwing booth was so awesome, giving the kids extra turns and making a big deal out of all their direct hits. I think he liked it that the noisy Americans cheered so loudly that they brought extra customers to his booth.

A Serious Santa Oversight

Today is St. Nikolaus Tag--Santa Claus day. Last night children in Germany put their shoes on the front porch and then Santa came and left either sweets in their shoes, if they've been good, or straw in their shoes if they've been bad. It was evident to Garrett and me that they'd be getting straw, an especially harsh punishment for Jacob who has severe hay fever. Best case scenario it would be a 50/50 mix of straw and treats. However, due to an unexplained Santa oversight they each received a large bag of wrapped German chocolates. In the picture Garrett is video taping this rare phenomenon of Santa stupidity. The only thing we can figure is Santa was unaware the previous renters had moved.

Days that drive a mother to strong drink...

Yesterday was a day to drive an otherwise teetotalling mother to strong drink. Immediately following the boys' school we drove to Jacob's psychiatrist appointment for his ADHD medication. After about an hour and a half there, we drove to Patch base to send our family Christmas gifts to the states. It was a completely hellish experience. I waited in line for a good half hour only to get to the front of the line and have them tell me that I needed to fill out customs forms for each package I was mailing and one of the boxes with exterior writing needed to be completely re-covered. With 4 kids sort of in tow I went back, to fill out customs forms. Jacob and Mason were messing around with the retractable line tapes and pushing eachother, Joe was running around, bumping into people, grabbing the flag (this is a military base and I was expecting someone to throw a major fit any second) and cutting the post office packing paper with a pair of scissors he found on one of the desks. When I tried to get him to sit and discipline him he started wailing and screaming and kicking and then playing the limp dishrag and the whole works. He wouldn't sit still and left his designated time out area to blow his nose and wipe his eyes on the--you guessed it--the flag. He was so naughty that Sam told me he heard a woman in line tell her daughter that Joe had mental problems and it wasn't polite to stare! Between desperately trying to control Joseph and trying to get Mason and Jacob to stop messing around and mailing 7 packages the Southern postman at the desk kept looking at me pityingly and said three different times "Maam, you have your hands full." I nearly killed my children in broad daylight with witnesses in a government building. The day didn't end there--Joseph and I had eye appointments which Garrett had to drive us to because they were going to dilate my eyes. After 2 1/2 hours at the eye doctor and then looking for glasses which, by the way, cost $600 for Joe and me we decided that the day had reached its capacity for pain and anguish and I "called in blind" from the dilation and skipped the young womens' activity. The bottle of wine in the picture was a gift from our German neighbors who came over on Sunday to celebrate Thanksgiving dinner with us. I thought about sending it to the Bradfords to christen their fancy boat with, but after yesterday, I might have found a better use for it!

Halloween--German Style

The night before Halloween our ward had a party with the German ward that meets in our building. Sam was a Punk zombie, Jacob and Mason both wanted to be Indiana Jones so we had two Indiana Jones' and Joseph was Iron Man. Garrett dressed up as Edward--I mean a vampire.

On Halloween we went with our friends, the Weigands, to Legoland, only an hour and a half away--are you thinking of visiting us now? Poor Garrett had to stay and work but we had the entire week off--every six weeks the German schools get one week off. We had a great time riding on the Bionicle rides, the Dragon castle and many more rides. Also, seeing their huge lego display of Europe.

Can you believe this castle below is made completely of legos?At Legoland they completely understood our lego needs, down to the last details. I had to take a pix of these WC signs--they were just too funny.

The boys also loved visiting their gift shop where you could put together your own special blend of legos and buy them by the kilo. Truly a dream come true for my boys who plan to design legos when they grow up! It was so cold--mostly just I was freezing. The boys even rode some of the rides that splash you which was truly crazy--we'll have to come here again in the summer when it's enjoyable to be splashed. As you can see, we barely escaped Lego Land but are more than willing to dare to do it again.

Kindergarten auf Deutsch

It occurred to me the other day that I haven't written anything about Joseph's kindergarten (preschool) experience. Joe goes to preschool which they call kindergarten in our little town. Above is a picture of him in front of the school. Kindergarten in Germany costs differently depending on how many kids you have--the more kids you have the less you pay--a concept that would be highly accepted in Utah but not especially lucrative! (Negative population growth has some benefits!) When I told them that we have 4 kids, they were astounded and unsure what to charge us. They had to look it up in their "kindergarten bible" and it turns out that if you have 4 kids then preschool is free. I think this is the first time in my life when having more children has actually cost me less. The kindergarten is so incredible. They have one room with pegs on the walls and gym mats on the floor so they can climb the walls and tumble. Above Joe is sitting in a small mirror house. They have two indoor play houses and a wood working area with real tools, including saws! The one (three don't) teachers who speaks English put my mind at ease when she explained that they can't use the woodworking tools until they receive proper safety instruction. What are they thinking giving saws and hammers to 3 to 5 year olds and telling them to play nice? Luckily for me, the English speaking teacher, Sabine, hasn't had time to instruct Joe so all his appendages are still intact, for the time being. Outside they have another incredible play area in "the garden". I don't know how much German Joseph is picking up, but Sabine informs me that the other children have learned the word "No", which they tell Joe whenever he is breaking a rule or they don't like what he's doing--apparently quite often during the day! Joe's claim to fame is a pair of Spider-Man slippers he got for his birthday--they have Spider Man's head sticking up out of the slippers near the toes. They don't make slippers like that here and since all the kids are required to wear slippers or "house shoes" while inside, the other kids love to come and feel Spider Man's head. The kids are also fascinated by his American snacks, his Star Wars t-shirts, and his Shrek crocs. Oh no, I've turned into one of those moms that buys the hideous clothes with characters all over them.

On the Monday before Joe's birthday, his school celebrated their Laternenfest. Each village does their own Lanternfest with the small children. Joe got to help make a paper lantern at school then they put a real--yes, real candle in the--what?--yes, paper lantern--and let the 3 to 5 year olds carry them around the village while they sing songs and fall over their own feet and hopefully don't start anything on fire. Our friends, the Weigands, suggested that we use special lantern flashlights attached to a pole that you can buy at the local drugstore. One or two other kids also used this method, but most all of the other kids had candles--and they scold me when I don't put a hat on Joseph to bring him to school! All the boys had fun with our flashlight candle. They would blow in the lantern and Joe would turn off the light from the switch on the pole, like they had blown the candle out, then Joe would turn it back on a few seconds later. It was really confusing some of the other little kids to see a "candle" that could turn off and on--those American kids are so weird! The last picture is super blurry but I thought it was pretty cool to see Joseph and the lanterns surrounding the fountain in our little village. We had a great time at our first lanternfest.

Are you missing some socks?

Has anyone seen the movie, "Mousetrap"? This weekend we've been living it. Friday the smell of death was so strong in our kitchen we knew we were going to have to take the kitchen apart until we found the Rat. It started out in a very careful, organized manner but quickly escalated to a frenzied hunt as we found rat poop behind cupboards and found stockpiles of our stuff. We found 11 of our socks, and 2 dish towels and a pair of boxer shorts from the previous tenants, behind the cupboard next to the sink, but still no rat. This morning we continued ripping out cupboards (which may never go back the same way again!) and finally found the dead rat and its main lair. A few more of our socks and alot more of the previous tenants' clothes were in there, along with a toy car, a marker, a colored pencil, a note I'd left for myself with a telephone number I'd been looking for, candy wrappers galore and more rat poop than the average farmer sees in a life time--oh, and a dead rat. I didn't include a picture of the beast so as not to scare any younger blog-viewers, but it was bigger than the Bradford's Rodney by a long shot. Two big garbage bags and one big bottle of bleach later, I'm still not seeing an end to the vermin's disgusting lifestyle. Atleast the smell is almost gone! Our own path of destruction and mayhem has clogged the kitchen with drawers and cupboards and every cleaning supply imaginable. I think we'll eat out tonight.

Real Germans and Real Germany

Garrett was gone in Garmisch, Germany all week last week for a dental conference. When he came home he surprised the boys with real German hiking sticks. Now they can be real hikers. When Germans do things, they go all the way--it's all or nothing. No one here would dream of owning a motorcycle without a complete matching leather outfit, boots and helmet. When they pick apples or pears in their own yards they put on a special overcoat just for picking fruit. The other day I did step-aerobics and then decided that while I was good and sweaty I'd go out and mow the lawn in my shorts and a fleece jacket I threw on as I walked out the door. After mowing for awhile I felt someone's eyes on me. I looked up and saw my neighbor just staring at me. I waved at him and he waved, but had a troubled look on his face and just stared--I knew I had made a social faux pas, but had no idea what it was. Later I talked to another neighbor and he went on and on about what I wore to mow the lawn! Even graffiti is an all or nothing kind of thing. Look at the house below--totally graffitied. It's amazing, but some of their graffiti is actually so involved it really looks like artwork. In the same town as the graffiti masterpiece you'll find quaint centuries-old houses.

We took these house pictures today in Tubingen. It seemed a little odd that Garrett got the day off for Columbus Day, but the boys had school. It was so nice to only have Joe with us for the afternoon as we walked through the old city. We ate lunch next to a statued fountain in the center of the square and watched people at their little tables sit and talk and people watch. We felt so German. I think I've found my second favorite food, next to chocolate. We ordered Doner Kebaps, a Turkish specialty, from a little stand. Kebaps are made from lamb turned on a spit. You put them in a pita with yogurt, onions, tomatoes, cabbage and the next thing you know you've eaten the whole thing. Heavenly! Are we enticing you to come visit? Good!

"Yours is Glorious Country, Honeychurch!"

There is no other word for this Fall in Germany except glorious. On Saturday we went for a walk in the woods behind our house and later that day hiked with Joe and Mason to the Urbach waterfalls only about 25 minutes away while Sam and Jacob went to a birthday party. When I got home from the waterfalls I realized I hadn't taken any pix of the actual waterfalls, only the trees surrounding the falls, but they speak for themselves. Once again, I must say that my brilliant husband needs his own photo studio--his pictures are much better than this! Sunday afternoon we went for a drive through the countryside to look at leaves and ended up in a grape vineyard. It was so picturesque that I decided to try the luscious-looking grapes. I now know where the term, "Sour Grapes" comes from. I think my face still hasn't stopped puckering.

The boys each wanted to take pictures too. This is a picture Sam took of us in the grape vineyard. Last week they all wanted to work for the LEGO company. As of this morning, they have each told me that they have decided to be photographers. This doesn't include Joe of course who is still holding out for a "Darth Vader's Apprentice" position.
I've corrupted my children. I picked an apple from a tree in one of the orchards we were photo-ing, and let them do the same. It'll probably come back to haunt me since they fertilize the trees with "natural" fertilizer and I'll probably get Giardhea---again.

German Rats Prefer Wonder Bread

We're finally settling down in our new house in Neuenhaus (-redundantly a town name which actually means "New House"). We've had plenty of excitement in the past few weeks that has kept us busy and since my boys have told everyone they meet, I may as well tell you. We've had an unwanted house guest or guests--a rat. I woke up one morning a day or so after we moved in and walked into the kitchen to see our new loaf of bread from the army grocery store ripped and scattered across my kitchen counter. While wondering which of my darling children was to blame I noticed nibbled holes in the bag. I have to give a disclaimer--I never buy Wonder Bread. I'm no health nut, but I grew up on wheat bread and Wonder Bread just turns into a sticky gluey substance on the roof of my mouth that I can't swallow down. I only bought Wonder Bread because they were out of the American wheat bread at the store and my children seem to lack the mature taste buds required to appreciate real bread--German bread! Anyway, there was my Wonderbread all over the counter and a perfectly delicious loaf of German bread, untouched sitting right next to it. I am forced to draw the conclusion that German rats are gluttons for refined flours and gluey substances on the top of their mouths. A few mornings later we woke up to Mason yelling from the hallway. He said he saw the rat run down the hall and go into a hole under our built in cupboards. In the picture he is demonstrating just how long the rat's tail is. We placed traps with chocolate, peanut butter and cheese, but other than the Wonder bread, which we did, unfortunately, buy and leave out again, the traps remained empty. We finally bought rat poison and I think that did the trick as we have had no further attacks. However, every time I look at our cupboards I think we must have a rat, rotting away under it. To my embarrassment, everytime the kids meet someone the first thing they say is,"We have a rat in our house." As I am unable to produce a corpse, I can't convince them that it is dead and if it's not dead, to shut-up about it anyway!

I talked to our landlord and she said because we live so near to the forest, we'll get alot of woodland creatures around. On the bright side, look at these pictures that are literally out our backdoor. The picture below that looks like a super-duper cool fort is actually what the hunters use to hang out in when they hunt (and you can see them around all the fields and through all the forests). When I asked what they hunt in this forest I was told wild boars and deer. The fort, the boars, it all sounds a little too much like themovie "The Village".

I know that you're all dying to hear how the boys are doing in school. Well, it's really hard--shocking, I know. We are now accepting prayers on their behalf as they try to learn German! I'm going in on Wednesdays and Fridays to help in their VKL class, it's basically an ESL class, but for learning German. They have kids from Turkey, Romania, Vietnam, England and a few other Eastern European countries in their class. They go to VKL for German and then they go to their regular classes for Math, Sport (P.E.), Swimming and Art. They put Sam and Jacob back in third grade because Germans are further in math than we are. For example, they learn their times tables in second grade! I love their math homework (no, they don't really love any homework at all), it's really good at preparing them for Algebra and really makes them think. The boys also use fountain pens in school. Try that out--it's not as easy as it looks in Harry Potter movies. On Monday and Thursday they have class until 5 p.m., on Tuesday, Wednesday and Friday until noon. Sam and Jacob got invited to a German boy's birthday party last weekend and all my boys love to play with Andreas, a good friend from church who also goes to their school. You skeptics out there may wonder about their adjustment, but if you'll see in the picture below, they are making a fort in the forest behind our house in a gulley with an old gate they found out there and a bunch of dead logs they dragged from everywhere. Making a fort in the forest is definitely a sign of well adjusted, normal boys. I am so proud of my boys for working so hard in German school. We're trying this out and working through this as a family and this feels right for us, right now. All our family and friends who agree with us are free to comment on our blog--the rest need not apply! Tschus!

OUR NEW HOUSE HAS A SWIMMING POOL, DOES YOURS?

So let's not get all caught up in minor details, like our pool hasn't worked since the '70s and has no water in it. The important thing is, it's a pool and you can do lots of things in an empty pool, like pretend to do water aerobics or see how long you can lay on the bottom of the pool. We got the keys to our rental home today and did the walk through for scratches and dents with the realtor and the home owner which only took about four hours to take pictures of all the areas and mark every crooked switch plate or ding in the doors. They are thorough in Germany! Take a look at the boys' bathroom--am I seeing spots? Each of those red circles is an individual circle tile and they cover the walls and floor. The red color doesn't look nearly as bright in the pictures, but let me assure you when you leave this bathroom you see little dark spots everywhere, like you just looked at the sun. Don't be jealous--someday maybe you'll have a a retro European bathroom too.


This picture is our family room. Not much to say except there's a fireplace in the corner. This is definitely the best feature of our new place--the backyard with a grapevine arbor, patio and ourdoor built in grill and fireplace. It's really nice. We're so excited about our arbor and patio I'm sure I'll be blogging pictures of all of us in December, sitting on patio furniture eating burgers in our swimsuits, snowboots and scarves.

These pictures are of the kitchen and eating area. It has more cupboards than I've seen in most German homes and beats our house in Iowa with its 5 cupboards. Does anyone know how to convert fahrenheit to celsius? Our food may be overcooked for awhile.